Euphemisms are funny. Instead of saying, "I'm going to the bathroom" I like saying, "I'm going to the Bank." Think about it. You make a deposit. Sometimes you need a receipt. Deposit is an odd word, historically. It comes from a latin gerund meaning "tucked-away thing." It generally referred to feces. The word in latin is 'depositum.' So, there is another connection. I hate it when people say, "I'm gonna go take crap." They don't take anything. Its bothersome.
In "A Grinch Night" the characters all call the bathroom the "euphemism."

Its five thirty in the morning. Five thirty. What in the name of the god that lives in my 'puter-side monkey lamp gave me the idea it was 'fun' to stay up until five thirty in the morning. Well, I haven't had a bad time. I can just see the bad times coming up when my biological clock is going to be saying, "Sleep! SLEEP! SLEEP!!!!" and my teachers are going to be saying "..." I don't know, whatever it is teachers say. If I knew what they were going to say that would make my schooling a little pointless, wouldn't it, Mr. Smartypants. Anyway, I think that the world should change to fit my needs. My schedule should be the correct one. Anyway, I'm just ranting because after a long period of abstinence I have decided to binge blog. As you can no doubt tell from my painfully long entries about nothing. Wait, thats what the whole thing is.

Phooey

I am interested in the convenience of diapers, but not the mess. The thought of not having to leave my seat to empty my bladder warms my heart. The problem is I would not be able to sit in the resulting mess. A friend suggested a powerful vacuum conveniently placed. When questioned about the storage he said it would blast the offending matter out with high pressure. It is an intriguing idea. Think about what it would do for crime, bad driving and crooked politicians. Those assholes will think twice about cutting you off if there is the possiblity of getting blasted by a high-powered projectile dookie. Plus, it will make every monkey envious. The problems are abuse of the system etc. Vacuums are not quite at a size where it would be practical, yet.
If practicality is the only issue, I suggest using teleportation. Once the technology is mastered it would be quite convenient. Imagine, no don't, a small piece of machinery that automatically transmits any unpleasant bit of business to the septic tank. This would also be an excellent method of birth control, provided the equipment is not bulky or awkward. Although that in itself would be a pretty good method of birth control.
Such technology as listed above would have drastic results on the population. It would be strange, I imagine, to get used to defecating or urinating in public. I am sure there would still be times when it would be a social faux pas, like when giving a gubernatorial address, but the convenience and cleanliness would be revolutionary. Gone would be the days of the greasy gas station bathroom. No more embarassing moments of holding shut the stall door because the lock is broken off. Toilet paper would become a thing of the past. It would save billions of trees.
With great ideas like these, its a wonder I'm not a millionaire.

I received my film back today, which is what triggered the blog from 1:21:50. It came out OK. I have one shot that is fifteen seconds of blinding white agony due to the horrible over-exposure. When one focuses a Bolex, this is the camera we filmed on, one opens the f-stop all the way up. This allows for more light to come through the shutter so one can see what is in front of the lens, how in focus it is, etc. I filmed on a bright sunny day, focused...and went straight to record. I forgot to reset the f-stop. I also had problems with shooting into shade. Being behind a fence, my ability to enter the construction compound was limited. I was thus unable to take a reading of the light near my planned subjects. Seeing as the sun was shining, I decided to set the f-stop to its maximum closed setting. Stupid, stupid, stupid. The area outside of the shade was fine, the subjects were stuck in the middle of a building's shadow. Oh well. It is my first project.

Yep. On Monday I shot my first 16mm footage. It was pretty sweet. Filming went well. Oh, wait, no it didn't. I had to haul my ass out of bed at 9 AM. That is exceedingly difficult. For three nights before that I had gotten 6 hours of sleep each not. My body is not accustomed to so little sleep. So, I got up early and then I had to go to the Bursar's office and deposit money on an account so I could buy the film. I then went to the appropriate area for equipment check-out-age (hereafter to be known as the 'cage'). My partner, Luke, and I had reserved the equipment for 10 AM, I was a couple minutes late, but that is OK because there is a twenty minute window. At 10:02 I got to the cage and...got in line. There was a guy standing there with fifteen or so pieces of equipment, each one containing three or four barcodes that needed to be checked in. Bah. Luke and I sat around waiting for the window to clear up. Eventually, we got the idea to go check on buying film at the FVASA (the only place you can) while we waited. We moseyed on down and arrived and no one was there. It sucked. We checked the timetable, someone was supposed to be there, but no one was. There was a significant lack of qualified individuals. Frustrated, we wandered back to the cage. The second window was open, seeing as the guy was still getting all his equipment checked in we walked over to the available window. The cage attendee (cager) hauled our equpiment out, took my ID card, swiped it through the swipey spot and said, "Oh, you haven't signed the form." I was taken aback. I thought I was in the clear. "OK," said I, "let me sign it." The cager considered me for a second, then replied "You've got to do that at the other window." "Five minutes, guys, " called out the first window cager, rather politely.
Again, Luke and I found ourselves waiting. We checked the FVASA again, still no people. Back at the cage I was able to check out the equipment. We grabbed our bounty and made for the FVASA. After a couple minutes of waiting we decided to go borrow my friend's light meter. Luke had planned on buying one, but the complete and utter lack of any at the store impeded said purchase. We dropped off the equipment in my room and made way for my friend's apartment. The walk was about a mile. Picking up the light meter went without incident. We walked the mile again to the FVASA. All of the essential ingredients for filming were there, except film. We had sunlight, camera, tripod, light meter and subject. The subject was a construction site. Pretty fancy. Upon our return to the FVASA we found the station wo-manned and were able to purchase our ever-sought after, much desired film.
Brick walls could not contain our excitement.
Our jubilee was rather dampened, however, when the camera and tripod appeared incompatible. The camera had but one screw hole on the bottom and it was many times too large for the puny, inadaquate tripod screw. The entire project was filmed by just resting the camera on the tripod. Perched precariously like a cat in the Christmas Tree. We finished filming and I sprinted to class and wound up late. Fantastic.

Take the Affliction Test Today!

Wow, its been...several months since I last wrote an entry. Umm, since June. Well, I graduated High School, very exciting, I didn't wear any pants under my gown. And I wore my Mudvayne T-Shirt, my sunglasses and flip-flops, or as some call them, "thongs." I went to Sweden, well, for the most part I was in Finland. But everyone there spoke Swedish and had swedish cultures and stuff. Its called Åland, look it up on a map, its between Sweden and Finland. I worked quite a bit at Point Sebago, a fake campground. I don't think I'll be going back, there was some unpleasantness involving my friends. And now I am at college, writing at a new computer and in a different state. I'm at RIT, in Henrietta, New York. Its pretty sweet so far. I'll keep updating now that I have some time on my hands. Oh yeah, Melissa has become an increasingly more important and lovely character in my life. (See the entry on prom, she is "Missy")