Working in the arcade I have noticed a cruel trick. A crane game sits nestled in a little alcove next to the Attendent's booth, and it is one of those "Play till you win" candy cranes. So you put your money in, drop the crane down, and if it picks nothing up, you can go again. It seems like a pretty sweet deal. It is, however, a curse also. Once you put your quarter in you are stuck until you win something. You paid your damned 25 cents, and only a miracle will keep you from getting it, so you sit there, watching the numb fingers of the crane fail miserably at grabbing any candy, listening to the out of tune synthesized circus music and praying with tears in your eyes for the next drop to pick up any piece of candy, anything, no matter how foul tasting or putrid. I sit and watch this from my stool and I chuckle, because I know of the Curse of the Candy Crane.

Moonlight is great. Since it is just a reflection of regular sunlight, when one takes a picture with a long delayed exposure time the pictures wind up looking somewhat like daytime. Its cool. I have a shot planned, but I need to wait for a clear night when the moon is full. There is this little cove on Nason's Beach and I want to take a picture of the night there, except I want it to be a little bit breezy, so the picture comes out looking like a painting, because the leaves will move around and not be in one spot for the entire time the shutter is open. I also like the way that moonlight makes everything different shades of black. It is beautiful. The water appears quite black, as does blood, but fields are a lighter black and people show up well. Its lovely, really.

Lady Amelia Eclairs: Best when eaten.

Lounge-a-lot pants: For the man too lazy for the walk to the can

Uncle Cletus's Jugs: Perfect for Moonshine and old timey jug bands.

Malletin brand Diplomas: We let the cat out of the bag...we mean skin. We let the cat out of its skin.

I just thought of a great name for a bar/lounge; The Relaxed Sphincter.

I was driving today and I almost didn't recognize where i was because of the foliage. A few days ago trees were still bare and lifeless, making winter seem as far away as the rapture. But today leaves were out in force. It looked like a different world. i think I like it. Leaves are dark on the top and light on the bottom, so when the wind blows hard the leaves flip around making the tree look like an 80s video game.

Prom is stuck in my memory as a series of snapshots of the evening, like a mental photo album. The first picture is of me, standing in my room in front of the mirror, struggling with the pants that were never tight enough and desperately fighting off my dog’s ubiquitous white hairs. The next photo is of me leaving my car at Matt’s house and jumping in mom’s car, remembering everything except Tiffany’s flower. Note the look of shock in the next picture, that is me realizing what I have forgotten. Here I am, finally at Alice Doughty’s house, awkwardly shoving the flower box into Tiffany’s hands as she does likewise to me. The next picture has the flash ridden goodbye and cramped backseat travel toward the hotel. The hotel lobby, a myriad of tuxes, dresses and out-of-place civilians, gathered in protective clusters and trying to remain casual while hoping that your shirt is tucked in correctly all the way aroud. Dinner; a long wait for food that wasn’t that good. The crowded dance floor is shaking in this photo, and in the next one the crowd has thinned out and couples are caught mid-sway. Ah, here we are, another one back to the hard beat of the bad music. Nick, Maria, Jess, Missy and I are sitting in the jazz lounge in this one, letting the soothing melodies of Dan Moore’s piano sink into our memory, in sharp contrast with the teeming dance floor. Dan finishes before the prom is over, so we stand around and chat with him, until most people are gone. Here is a photo of Missy and I in the middle of the room, far from the dance floor, dancing to the song she requested, the song she has waited for for the entire evening. All of us are jammed into an elevator that was made for four but is now holding nine. Jess’ room, final photos and goodbyes as Matt Harrison, Andrea Johnson, Jeremy Griffin, Dakotah Woitko, Jason Jewett, Heather Flick, Nick Poulin, Missy Knight and I head back to Matt’s house for the post-prom party. The long car ride next to Missy, finally working up the nerve to hold her hand. Matt’s party, with all of the above plus Chris Maher, Alan Graffam, Chris Ford and Shannon in Matt’s living room. Oddly enough Matt was among the last to arrive. Everyone laughing at a sleeping Chris Ford as we toss a sock into his face and he sleeps through it. Sleeping masses on the floor after watching a movie and playing video games and talking until five in the morning. And my favorite picture, Missy’s face smiling at mine at a distance of two noses.

Prom Pics

Hooray for Kittens!

Elephants are dying of coronaries.
They build up stress worrying about herd members.
When one dies, the rest move it to the burial grounds.
Seven were struck dead by a train in India.
Hundreds came to mourn.

Snuggles, The Fluffy Springtime Bear


Man in wheelchair killed in train accident.
Wreckage is a mix of metal and blood.
An ugly orgy of dismemberment.

Rails, to the man, were an impediment.
His wheels were stuck in scads of sticky mud.
Man in wheelchair killed in train accident.

The conductor turned to grab a breath mint.
He turned back to his job and shouted, "Crud!"
An ugly orgy of dismemberment.

Scared, the man knew what the train whistle meant.
Train rushed down, more powerful than a flood.
Man in wheelchair killed in train accident.

The conductor was done with his brief stint.
He was fired for sure, his job a dud.
An ugly orgy of dismemberment.

The wheelchair skittered, making sparks like flint.
The man hit the train with a painful "thud."
Man in wheelchair killed in train accident.
An ugly orgy of dismemberment.

Ah, I just performed in my last play in my high school career. Its actually saddening. I hadn't thought that it would sadden me. I felt no different after my last soccer game, and yet after my last performance...huh. I had quite a bit of fun, even though I didn't like the play very much. Oh well.

Clouds are cool. They look fluffy and soft, but have you ever thought of how many tons the average cloud must weigh? They must be massive. And then you get the dark clouds, which not only are heavy, but denser. And yet they just float up in the sky, like someone squirted a can of whipped cream there. They just sit on the sky like its not unnatural for a pond to be floating above our heads. What I want to see, more than anything really, is all the water in clouds to condense at once, so that you get this giant cloud shaped sheet of water as opposed to the jarring random drops of cold water that is rain. It would be beautiful to see a wall of water descending upon the world. Of course, everything would be crushed, if you were outside you would be completely fucked, but it would be awesome to watch. The clouds would be white, then suddenly they would transform into a clear shimmering mass and drop. So anyway, clouds are cool.

I think I am going to shave my head. No I'm not, but I've thought about it. If I were ever required to cut my hair short, like for military service, then I would go whole hog and expose my scalp. There is something that i really like about the shape of the human skull. I like how it is round on top, and yet very flat on the sides. I like the dimensions, it is very pleasing to me. I am sad that I will never have a chance to see mine (hopefully).

Gah. i just made a frozen meal of "Fiesta Chicken." The name really bothers me. Fiesta Chicken, Party Chicken. I don't see what was so great about it. Sure, it was good, but is that any reason to try to convince the buyer that it will increase your level of fun? Also, and this is amusing, the makers decided to call it "Fiesta Chicken" when they know that they send it out in single serving packages. Parties insinuate many people. Maybe the chickens were "party animals" (pardon the pun) before they died. One would think that if they are going to start with the name in spanish they would at least finish the job, so it said "Fiesta Pollo" but no. They happened to suck. Then there is the box. It displays a banner that reads "With Green Peppers!" I think that is the equivalent of buying a car that has the banner "With Steering Wheel!" Bah, I need to eat simpler food, this is complicating my life.